what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
My day in three words: secret purse cake
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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