i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
