So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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