i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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