There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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