i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Randomize
