the new term for farting is butt boxing.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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