hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
