I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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