My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
