Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
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