So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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