what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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