why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
