Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
