It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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