Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
