yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Randomize
