beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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