I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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