i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
