Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
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