We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize