Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
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No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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