Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
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The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
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The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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