he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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