Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
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