I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
