so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
