Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
