If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
