Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
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