So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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