You're my little dorito
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
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