Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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