guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
