I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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