I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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