two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
