I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
