It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
