he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize