I love black thongs
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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