She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize