How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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