Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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