Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
