its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
do herpes really smell.
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she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
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You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.