whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize
