just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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