it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
