It was confusing and full of hummus
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
